Soooo I must congratulate you on your recent successes with the iPhone 5s. It’s clear you have thought outside the box and brought new features to the forefront of society. Technological advances so blinding, us mere mortals are left in awe of your seemingly endless talents. Now.. which feature in particular floats my goat I hear you ask?? Of course I am referring to the technological breakthrough known to man as “Touch ID” a feature SO SAFE… SO SECURE… SO PERSONALIZED.. After all, who has my fingers?! (Putting aside all possible hostel scenarios, but I try to steal clear of those parts of Europe) my 5s.. Mine.. All mine, operated only by MY FINGERPRINT 🙂 amazing!
NWATTTTTTT! Unless their is some Spanish prick (phone.. and shoes lost in a drunken stupor in Barcelona) with my elegant, manicured talons complete with matching finger prints would you care to explain to me why it is possible for said prick to be using my iPhone? Come on.. Speak up Apple, I can’t hear you thought not. You’re shit! And I hereby present you with this award for your royal shitness (that’s a word) in data protection. Phone is now blacklisted, there are no winners (apart from you as I need to buy a new phone) and as for the poor spaniard at least he is left with my shoes (I’m currently awaiting to turn into a princess, it happened to that Cinderella bitch so I don’t see why it can’t happen to me, I bet she was drunk too)
Sincerely (up) Yours