Home News The curse of Chronic Bitch Face

The curse of Chronic Bitch Face

1586
SHARE

Do you have a female friend or have you ever seen a beautiful women that you just had to go over and talk too only to find that she looks like she is about to pull out and ice pick and start stabbing you as if you where in the movie Basic Instinct? Well we have. I met a charming lady recently who has Chronic Bitch Face, well when I say met, the truth is I actually already knew her, so it was easy for me to go over and start talking to her. At first glance, I started to feel nervous at the way she was looking at me. Although our conversation was great and she really liked talking to me, her face said something different. Check out this article below about the Curse of Chronic Bitch Face.

Chronic bitch face is a debilitating attribute that affects the facial muscles, causing the afflicted to look like a total and complete bitch. This crippling and socially impairing handicap deems a girl guilty of looking pissed off 80 percent of the time. Symptoms include emotionless eyes, fierce eyebrows, and an overall stern appearance. As a girl affected by chronic bitch face, I can personally attest that it is no fun and quite annoying. It’s not that I’m actually constantly angry or irritated–my face just happens to naturally look like that of a total asshole. I’m not talking about a Tyra Banks type of beautiful fierceness, I’m talking about a chronic Grumpy Cat expression. Unless I’m actively smiling or making an effort to not look like I just murdered a family of six, I look like I’m pissed at the world. It sucks, because other than that, I’m a relatively approachable person (after I’ve had my coffee, that is). You know that you also suffer from chronic bitch face if you resonate with the following situations:

  1. You have to reassure your friends anywhere from five to 10 times a day that you are NOT mad at them.
  2. You may feel totally content and happy, but you look like Kristen Stewart.
  3. You sometimes forget how mean you look and are confused when people avoid eye contact or look terrified to be around you.
  4. Your cute, flirtatious smile actually makes you look like you’ve devised a new murder scheme.
  5. Your family constantly tells you smile, and you’re like, “I’m fucking happy, dammit.”
  6. Interviews are your worst nightmare, because who would hire a girl who looks like she drowns kittens for fun?
  7. The freshmen in your sorority are all afraid of you because you look like a raging asshole.
  8. You get asked the same questions on a daily basis: ”Are you pissed about something?” “Are you sure you’re okay? You don’t look okay.” “Are you bored?” “Seriously, what’s wrong?”
  9. You have to respond to these questions, saying, “NOTHING IS WRONG. IT’S JUST MY FACE.”
  10. Your friends eventually open up to you and tell you they were intimidated by you the first few times they met you. You’ve gotten, “I thought you hated me” a solid 15 times.

Read the full article here: totalsororitymove.com/chronicles-of-a-girl-with-chronic-bitch-face/

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here